Emotional Independence: 2 ways to improve it fast

Emotional independence makes you feel like life is a marvel. If you do not feel it, there is a path to this state of mind. Today’s post will be short. But, important. I want to share my experience and realization, that made me feel so peaceful and in love with myself. It helped my relationships with people. I want to talk about emotional independence, that has a profound impact on our physical health as well. Moreover, on each and every illness, that we attract into our lives. Please notice: I do not say: that happens to us, I say: that we attract into our lives.

Stress and spine connection

If you have a stressful job, or experience a difficult situation in your life, it very likely leads to problems with your back (spine), as stress means muscle tension. Your spine is surrounded by muscles. If the muscles are tense, your spine will not work well. Pain and problems with other internal organs will show up. In my life I used to experience a prolonged stress. It lasted several years, and prior to that, I often felt sadness.

Problems with spine appeared about 5 years ago. Since then I started watching them. I observed, that I felt pain in my back when I was stressed! Heal your emotional health, and you will support your spine big time. That is why, when our customers ask us about our organic beds, whether they will solve their back problems, I say: “Even the most helpful bed, our organic buckwheat bed, is only a support tool. It will help, but the main thing should be done elsewhere.” However, surround yourself with the right tools, and it will take you much closer to health.

My emotional struggles

In the past three years I lost internal joy. It was a result of what I felt in my relationships with a few people, that I liked very much. I felt that their behaviour created such difficulty, that it affected me in a big way. So, I tried many things to feel better: spent much time in nature, met great people, had fun, travelled, visited beautiful places, started working again on amazing projects. These things were on the surface. When they lasted, I felt good.

Emotional independence, drawing by Martyna Bizdra

A wonderful break through experience

However, when time passed, the internal sadness came back. Again and again. Until a special experience happened, which turned my life upside-down. I started taking part in breathing sessions, lead by a breathing teacher, Magda. After one of the sessions, I felt incredibly relaxed. It was a deep experience of internal unity with all there is. As if my body did not exist, instead there was vibrating energy and love.

That emotional memory stayed with me. When I came back home, I entered into meditation, lead by Joe Dispenza. It is a rather long meditation, in which you take an emotional state that causes you stress, and transform it into another. You do it in deep relaxation, when your mind enters higher alpha and theta brain wave frequences. These states help you connect with your subconscious and influence it.

The breathing sessions helped my body relax and later achieve greater depth in my meditation. Meditation after meditation, I worked in this deeply relaxed state on several emotions that blocked me in my life: lack of self-belief, love and others.

Emotional independence

I started feeling better, and watched something amazing happen: my good emotional states were happening, no matter what other people did or said. Situations that previously lead me to sadness, stress or fear, now were simply happening. I let them impact me emotionally, and I felt the emotions. But I remained internally grounded and silently happy.

Subsequently… it dawned on me: “you became emotionally independent”. I realized, that previously I gave my power to other people. If they behaved and treated me well, I felt good. If not, I felt sad and lonely, sometimes fearful. In that time, (I see this now), I felt that people were responsible for my happiness. However, once I started reshaping my emotional states in meditation, I felt that I was the creator in my life again.

If I could work on my emotions in meditations, and from feeling unworthy start feeling amazing self-love, respect and care, it meant to me that I could be the creator in my life. From simple “could”, happened “I can”, by repeating the meditations when it was possible. It was me, who started creating how I felt. And it felt wonderful.

Emotional independence felt great, and it helped me see, that in my past relationships with people, I created the emotional states that were so difficult to me to cope with. It was not them, but me.

Emotional independence, two ways to improve mental health

I detest complex things. If there are multiple, complex strategies, I get bored. I love simplicity, and believe, that if anything can be done well, it can be done simply. This is what nature does, it finds the simplest, most elegant path. In reaching the emotional well-being, improving mental health, I found two steps:

1. Deep breathing exercises, sessions, lead at first by a skilled and experienced teacher. They will take you to mental health and deep relaxation, even feeling like you are floating outside of your body, and in one with everything. They will most likely relax you.
2. Meditation, in which you consciously work on your emotional states. I suggest Joe Dispenza meditations, like the one attached to his wonderful book, of a title I do not like : “Breaking the habit of being yourself”.

Mental health, drawing by Martyna Bizdra

Where is your center

When it comes to people with low self-esteem, the center of their world is on the outside. In what other people do or say, the economical or political situation, etc. They feel that the outer world influences them, creates emotions and feelings, which leads to reactions, behaviours and finally, a character.

However, if you can feel great, simply by meditating and entering deep relaxation, you became the creator of what and how you feel. Moreover, you enter the world of emotional independence, which in fact is the mental emotional health, responsibility for your feelings. When you feel great just by being “you”, you create what you feel. If you create the emotions in meditation, you can do that in any other situation. You become the creator.

Jesus lead by example

When reading the Bible, I was always stunned by Jesus. How emotionally independent he was. People in his surrounding did all sorts of things, and he saw everything there was. He experienced the depth of evil and beauty, and yet, he remained in state of love for the world and people. Always there, and in good emotional state, ready to bring peace.

And, this is who we truly are. Like him, we can create emotions and feelings, independently of what is happening in our lives. The center of your emotional health is in your hands. Not in other people’s or situations.

Focus on yourself, let others be

People can do all sorts of things. They have their own lives and struggles. If something happens, let it impact you, feel it and dive into the feelings. Feel them, and feel your body.

Nowadays, I am fascinated by what I feel in all sorts of situations. However, now I know deep in my heart, that the feelings I have in the end, are my responsibility. I feel self-love independently of the outer world, because I can create it, and I am enough to be loved just as I am. Simply, because I love myself. It is the starting emotion.

If you can give yourself the emotion, you do not need that from the outside, because you have it. You are full, complete, and in self-love. Further, you can simply be, relax and participate in the world, without longing. Furthermore, in this state, you follow what you like and what you do not like, as your guide. If people behave in harmful ways towards you, you can choose to pause the relationship or talk about it, instead of feeling hurt. Remember here: If you feel hurt, it means that you chose this reaction.

This is critical if we want health and longevity. As I mentioned at the beginning of the article, stress and sad feelings cause harm in our lives and destroy our health. If longevity is something you care for, emotional independence should be your guiding star. Read more about Longevity, telomers, emotions, in our article

Longevity quest

Emotional independence and organic beds. 2 ways to improve well-being

As I mentioned above, when we take responsibility for our lives, emotions, and know that we can create the positive, optimistic emotional states, life becomes so much better. Like an exploration. A journey, full of miracles. This is the key to a fulfilling life. The foundation. But, we can help ourselves, by supporting our health, and making our bodies and minds strong. Stronger minds and muscles, nerves, bones, will support the brain and emotional stability.

This is one of the key reasons why we created our natural organic mattresses. They help you sleep better, are filled with power plants (as for example the magical mustard mattress, with a plant known to man for over 5 thousand years, read the fascinating story here: Floor beds with power plants), look beautiful, are minimalistic and help your spine relax and come back to its good structure. See them now, and take one for yourself.

Handmade organic mattress

Suggested reading

Joe Dispenza “Breaking the habit of being yourself”

“Becoming supernatural”

Joe Dispenza website